Tag Archives: thomas j bellezza

Strength within.

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That person you fell in love with whom deceived you, that’s a hammer.The guy who flipped you off in traffic today, he’s severe weather. Those stresses? Tiny cracks on the surface. Things that will beat away at something until it finally gives way to their pressures, without second thought to the erosion it leaves behind, the corrosion it inflicts.

In the center of all the synapses and veins, amongst the slabs of movement and an intestinal prison, lies stone. Made to persevere all of the elements and ensure the march carries on at a pace unseen since 330 BC. Some masonry remains in tact through avoidance, a lack in the ability to face problems head on under the assumption that shying from the pain will cause minor cracks, but they can be written off as weathering due to time. Other stories are made through tackling the troubles out to abrade it’s sturdy exterior.

Either way, it’s inside of us. The ability to fight or flee, to crack or totally crumble. There are rocks at the end of the journey, a little more beat up than others. The stories they can share at the finish line vary like the time it takes to pressurize a diamond, and in the end may there be an ear intrigued to hear them. Here’s to hoping it’s full of adventure, of heart break and doubt. With joy and elation from that same broken heart now mended and scarred. To the belief we can all find that strength within.

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Pedometer Rollover

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I’m lucky I don’t care about the age of my shoe since it just so happens to coincide with the fact that I’m often broke. I kept a pair of Converse so long it was just walking barefoot by the end of their tenure. They don’t offer me much comfort to begin with so being years old wasn’t really helping my knees argument for better quality sneaker. Posture too, always clamoring for good Posture.

I said some cliche shit, just to myself, about how it’s the memories attached to them that makes me keep them so long. Which made me laugh at how corny I was being, though jokingly, I still began to think about how many steps I’d taken since first purchasing some of my footwear. I found myself sad thinking of, yes, how many literal steps they had taken, but where the furthest point from which I stepped to where I stood measured out to be.

I own a pair of shoes that have been probably as far as Hagerstown, Maryland to see some family for Christmas. I’ve been as far south as Annapolis being as how I resided there with my Girlfriend of the time, but have been as far as Miami. Just have gotten new shoes since then. It makes me sad for the shoes I own now, having not seen more of the miles this earth has to offer.

So here’s to more variety in use. Not necessarily to an increase in wear and tear, merely a promise to wear them in all sorts of situations to tear things up. May they hold strong as I do and may states move like weeks. There’s a lot of World out there to see and it’s a real pain to do with bare feet, so lets make that $50 you shell out mean something.

The Foundation

friendship-betrayal

My roommate pointed out we have an awful lot of plastic bags in our pantry. This is undoubtedly a result of going to Walgreens or Rite Aid several times a week for various things, as it’s closest to my apartment. I don’t know why I say things, it’s always just pasta, ice cream, and Utz Hot Curls. 99 cents, they’re dope.

She was nice enough to have given me a tote bag to use. As the hunger hit for da hot curlz, I decided to pick up the usual various things, along with Q-tips and a Diet Pepsi. I became a weirdo at this point because I didn’t grab a basket thinking I’d be able to handle all I was originally purchasing, and I refused to use the tote out of a socially awkward disposition against anyone possibly thinking I’m thinking about stealing, which is more rooted in the fact I just care in general what people think of me too much.

So finally I tapped and decided to go get some help. I put everything down by the Q-tips, got a basket, went back and proceeded to gather up things left. Peter was on tonight, who’s a cool kid. Not as cool as Michael from Rite Aid, but ill in his own regard none-the-less. We had a chat, I paid, and was on my way back.

Upon putting things away, I realized my Diet Pepsi was missing. Did Peter mess up or did I forget to grab it? Peter was my initial thought. I said to myself, “Myself.. Peter wouldn’t do that, man. You know this. You’ve built such a foundation of trust and general camaraderie that the astronomical odds of that far surpass being struck by lighting-Pete wouldn’t do that to ya!”

I wanted to believe it but I wanted to buy that Diet Pepsi so bad, there’s no way I had forgotten it. Peter had forsaken me.


Left it next to the Q-tips. Bought that one and another.
2/$3, not bad.

…now how do I come clean to Peter about this?